Jaw Surgery Day 26

Ok, first I just want to shout out to some of my fellow jaw surgery bloggers who I have been following. They have all had double jaw surgery, they have been wired or banded shut, and one has dealt with an infection. As difficult as everything has been for me they have had it worse! So, I just want to say that each of you have been an amazing inspiration and encouragement to me! Thank you so much for sharing your stories!!!

I intended to make a 3 week update last Thursday, but I have been so exhausted the past few days I really haven't had the energy. I knew this recovery was going to take a long time, but sometimes I get impatient and frustrated with the reality of how slow it is.

Common Questions I am Asked:

Are you in pain?
No, generally I am not pain. Sometimes I sleep too much on one side or use my jaw a lot it will get sore and hurt a little, but overall I am just quite uncomfortable. Even in the first week (which was the worst) I would have described myself as more uncomfortable rather than in pain.

Have you lost weight?
I don't own a scale and I haven't been weighed anywhere else since before surgery, so I don't know.  My clothes are fitting just slightly looser around the waistline. I don't know if that means I have actually lost weight or is just a consequence of the liquid diet not filling me up the same. Frankly, being so thin has always been a really sensitive issue for me so I'd rather not know the numbers.

Can you eat?
This coming Thursday (Nov. 15th) I am allowed to start eating soft foods! I asked if I could have a fast food burger (those are soft, right?) and was told no. Boo! Oh well. I am really excited for scrambled eggs, and macaroni and cheese. I don't have any idea when I will get to move on to more than just soft foods.

Other things:
Swelling has reached a point where it isn't changing much from day to day. I really am still quite swollen while at the same time looking a lot more "normal". I probably see the swelling more than anybody else and even I get tricked in to thinking I am looking quite well. Which, it is true I am looking much better! I am even somewhat comfortable with how I look. But the problem is that it makes me think I should be doing a lot better physically than I am. I have been really really low energy. Right now if I get up, get dressed, and unload the dishwasher that is productive day. I have to actively remind myself that it really wasn't that long ago that I had major surgery (it weird how your mind deals with traumatic events. My surgery feels like a distant memory) and I am right on track with where I should be physically.

Numbness is probably the most mentally/emotionally challenging thing for me to deal with. I don't even really know how to explain how distressing it is. I don't think if anyone had tried to explain it to me beforehand that I would have understood. My entire lower lip and chin are still basically numb. I think sliiight feeling is coming back in tiny little spots, but it is really hard to tell. Most of the time the lower lip and chin tingle (like if you sat on your foot and it fell asleep) and while that is really annoying it is also somewhat comforting because it means the nerves are trying to heal themselves. If I don't feel any tingles for awhile I start to get paranoid.

Breakouts! This is kind of a gross one, but I want to mention it for people behind me who are going through this. Another girl mentioned her face was really oily after surgery and she was breaking out. Well, when I read that I thought since it hadn't happened to me that I was in the clear. Wrong! Since my last post my face has decided to be quite oily and my chin especially has been breaking out awfully! Normally I have really dry skin, so this is odd for me and I am not quite sure how to handle it. My regular face wash is too gentle. My husband's face wash is too harsh. I am going to be treating it with a homemade coconut oil and salt scrub (that is literally all it is. mix some oil and salt together. scrub on face) that my sister recommended to me. Cleansing, moisturizing, and healing all in one! So we will see how that goes.

I am really self conscious of my smile. Since my lower lip and chin are not only numb, but also stiff my smile is really goofy. My husband says that when I am happy and smiling without realizing it that my smile does look natural. But I haven't seen that! I used to get compliments on my smile. Add that to the list of things I didn't realize were so important to me until after surgery. I hope I get my smile back!

How about some pictures! Since swelling hasn't been changing much and I have been really tired I haven't been taking a lot of photos.

Day 18

Day 24
See! Almost a week between and no discernible difference.  I think it is hard to tell in photos (especially when I do my make-up so nice and pick the best photos.) but I am really am still very swollen. And the right side is more swollen the left. I am not sure why. 

Profile day 25
I have a chin! It makes my nose fit better on my face.

I am not at the point yet where I am happy that I went through with this. If my lower lip and chin stay numb I feel that would in no way be a good trade off for a correct bite. In fact I would probably end up depressed. The thing that keeps me going right now is hope that the feeling will come back. I can say now that even though I am not in love with how I look, I can live with it (just as a point of clarification I would like to stress that I went through this surgery to correct a medical deformity with my jaw, not for cosmetic reasons). And really, since I am still quite swollen that should only get better. So, if my feeling does return then I do I think I will be able to say that I am glad I went through this.

Wow! This turned out a lot longer than I expected! Kudos to you if you read all the way through! Also, thank you so much to everyone who comments on my blog. Your kind words are really appreciated!

I don't go back to see my surgeon again until after Thanksgiving so unless anything major happens I don't think I will be updating again till then.

Jaw Surgery Day 15

It has been two weeks! I am done with antibiotics and I haven't had any pain killers in a few days! My mood is still down, but improving.

I was supposed to have my two week post-op today, but I went in on Monday since I had been running a low fever. I checked out fine, so I don't know what the fever is about.

Anyway, how about some pics!

Day 10. 

Went to the mall with my little sis to get a new bottle of foundation. She got her first bottle of foundation and a tube of concealer while we were there! 

Day 11.

Day 14.

My little sis left early in the morning. So I am taking care of myself now. Managed to do some yoga. Starting to feel a little more human!

Big messy sock bun! So awesome for dirty hair. ;)

Profile. I thought this sorta half silhouette effect was neat

Day 15. Today. 

I do feel pretty with make-up on.

Swelling has reached a point where it going down really slowly, but you can see a little definition there between my cheekbone and my cheek! 

Thank so much to everyone who has given me an encouraging comment either here or on my facebook. This has been the most difficult thing I have ever gone through and each one of your comments really mean a lot to me!

Jaw Surgery Day 9

Days 3 and 4 I think weren't too bad. I honestly don't even remember.

Day 5 I was feeling really nauseous all day. That night I threw up... and continued to throw up every couple hours till morning. Except after the second time there was nothing left but my body was still trying to throw up. We called my regular doctor around 3am (I didn't know that in these type of situations you could actually talk to you regular doctor in the middle of the night!) and he said my body was probably just overloaded with painkillers. Basically all I had to do was stop taking painkillers and wait it out. That was not enjoyable in the least. Oh, throwing up wasn't really made any worse because of my jaw, your body just works it out I guess! but still not fun.

Day 6 I don't remember. But here is a picture!

Pretty swollen and you can see the bruising a bit. 

Day 7 I started getting really emotional. Worried about the lack of feeling in my lip and my looks. I kept feeling like I had had to cry, but couldn't just outright cry. I even watched sad music videos and A Little Princess to try and make me cry! I didn't sleep at all that night. Kept trying, but nothing.

Did my eye make-up and a little blush. I actually felt pretty. You can see the bruising on my lower cheeks and all the way down my chest!

We went out to eat at Chili's that night. I called ahead and asked if they could blend their Chicken Enchilada Soup for me. It was good to get out of the house for a short bit.

Day 8 I had my one week post-op with my surgeon. He showed me how to position my teeth correctly and said I had to practice a few times a day to train my muscles. It is already easier. No infection! I was a bit worried about that because there is some pain on my left side and I have been running a low fever, but it is probably just a pulled muscle. A stitch in the back of my mouth has come loose and was bothering me so my surgeon trimmed that. Much better! He said I could sleep on my side, it would't mess up my jaw, if it was painful I'd move naturally.

Oh, I cried a little at the surgeon's office. I don't know why everything was good news! My surgeon even seemed a bit surprised that I was already feeling tingles in my lip and chin. He said that is a really really good sign for the feeling coming back. I still actually feel nothing, but it sure is tingling a lot.

After I got home from my post-op appointment I thought I would sleep. I was falling asleep in the car, but no such luck at home! Eventually I got up and went on a 30min walk. Probably overdid it a bit, but I was hoping it would help me sleep. Nope.

Later in the afternoon we went to Target to get me a waterpik. When we got back home I finally cried for real. And cried... and cried... and cried. Dan was so so good about it! He just held me. He knew I needed it. Put on some relaxing music and was finally able to sleep. I woke up a few times in the night, but I left the music on and that helped lull me back to sleep.

Day 9 is today! I have been eating well today. Oh! I was eating some soup (surprise surprise! soup.) and didn't realize it till I ha done it but I actually fit the spoon into my mouth instead of slurping from it. This got me really excited and I went and grabbed a pudding cup from the pantry and ate that. I few days ago I couldn't even get a baby spoon in my mouth. I am enjoying eating a bit more normally even if everything is still liquid.

A full face of make-up to hide the bruising on my cheeks and a scarf to hide the bruising on my chest. It was cold here today anyway! I feel like an ugly man today. I am really hating my face.

 I MISS MY OLD FACE!!!

I am really glad I waited to get this surgery till after I was married, but honestly at this point I am not sure I am glad I actually went through with it. It kinda feels like a bad dream that I can't wake up from. 

Jaw Surgery Day 4

Ok. I am counting the day I had surgery as day 1. That was October 18th. Today is the 21st. I had lower jaw surgery to correct my open/over bite (it is was a little bit of both). I am glad I only had to have surgery on one jaw. I can't imagine having to deal with all my upper face being swollen/immobile too! This video does a pretty good job of explaining what I had done: BSSO and Genioplasty

I wanted to blog a bit about my experience because it is hard to find blogs that deal with an open/over bite like mine. The majority of blogs out there seem to be about underbites.

Delicious steak the night before my surgery! Mhmm!!! 

Walking in to the hospital at 5:30am. We are a little tired. 

Getting ready. 

I wasn't really nervous until the point where they were wheeling me away on the bed, but by this point they had started some drugs in my IV so I wasn't really aware of what was going on. So, I was was only nervous for like a second.  I don't really remember what happened after this point. I didn't wake up  till I was already in recovery. I remember being in some pain and crying. I think a nurse was telling me not to cry because I'd make it worse. I guess I got some pain meds then. Idk. I don't know how long I was in recovery. After awhile they moved me to a room. I was there for a little bit until Dan came back (he had to go to class while I was in surgery). 

I threw up twice the first day because of blood in my stomach I think. Throwing up was something I was really worried about, but it ended up being fine. Thankfully Dan was there to grab something because both times there was no nurse around. No mess! Yay! Then I was given some anti-nausea meds. That helped for sure. Also, I kept to warm liquids. 

I don't think if this next picture is from late in the first day or early on the second day. But the swelling really wasn't too bad yet. 

I talked a lot that first day. I was surprised by how much I talked! It started taking it toll though. So the second day I was writing things down a lot more.  Now I am talking a lot less!

Dan stayed with me the whole time I was in the hospital. I am really glad he did. 

Here is a pic from on the way home from the hospital. This was around 4pm I think. I was feeling alright. But after walking around Target (picking up my prescriptions) and the long drive home I was not feeling so well anymore.  The swelling was up for sure by the time I got home. I don't think you can tell from a pic, but it was making everything more difficult. 

Yesterday (day 3) was the worst so far. The swelling was pretty high and  all the meds were making me really nauseous. Dan went and talked to a pharmacist and got me an anti-acid. I took that late in the afternoon and it helped some. Then Lisa (my little sister is here to help out) and Dan were eating some spaghetti and meatballs. It smelled so good! All I had been eating was sweet smoothie like things. I didn't know I was going to miss regular foods so bad so fast! I insisted that Dan blend me up some spaghetti. He thought it was going to be really gross, but finally did it for me anyway and conceded that it actually tasted good (yeah, he tested it for me). 

Here is Dan with my blended spaghetti and meatballs. Oh! I picked up these cups on a whim when we got my prescriptions after surgery and I am so glad! They are very helpful. I can't use spoons yet (can't open my mouth enough), but I can drink out of a cup without spilling. :)

On the third day I took a bath (well.. Basically Dan gave me a bath. I was pretty out of it!), but didn't wash my hair. Started using ice. Omg! I never loved ice so much! It really helps! I didn't want it in the hospital because my cheeks were so tender I didn't want any pressure on them. Maybe I should have let them put ice on me, Idk. 

No pictures from the third day because I looked especially gross. 

Anyway, today is day four and thanks to the anti-acids I am feeling a lot better today. Swelling and pain is still pretty much the same as yesterday. I took a shower with Dan's help and did wash my hair. The bruising is starting to become more apparent. It is all down my chest. I think you can only see a bit on my lower cheeks/chin in the picture though. 

So far this experience has been better then I expected in some ways and worse in others. I am doing alright. Just taking it one day at a time. Eating (well... drinking broth and juice) was a lot easier the first and second day. Yesterday and today it has been pretty difficult, but I am keeping up. Hoping for the swelling to do down soon! 

For the last couple hours my lower lip area has been really tingly. It is a good sign I think, but omg it is annoying! It is pretty much the same kind of tingling as if your leg or hand fell asleep, but for HOURS. Nothing could have prepared me for this. Oh well. I am kinda glad I went in to this not knowing what exactly to expect. Going through it now I don't think I would choose to experience this, but at the same time it is not too terrible. I don't really know how to explain it. 

Ok. I guess I will update again later. :)

Jaw Surgery - Sleep Study Results and Insurance Problems

Hey, so I haven't really updated because I have just been in a waiting period. Nothing much to do right now but wait till the insurance problems get sorted out and we can finally set a date for the surgery.

For some reason my insurance denied my pre-determination on the basis of my surgery being a "dental" procedure not a "medical" procedure. This isn't true! But nothing will convince them otherwise. My surgeon even called and tried to explain to them, but nooo. The lovely lady who processes the billing and insurance at my surgeon's office says this is all very weird and they have never had this problem before.

There were a brief few hours where I was freaking out and thinking this was the end, I am not gonna be able to get surgery now. Now things are looking up and I think I needed to go through that to learn a couple lessons.

1) My husband said even if we have to go through the dental insurance, which would cost us SEVERAL thousand dollars more, we will still get it because he sees the surgery as that important to my health. Wow! The fact that he is willing to do that for me, without even an ounce of hesitation or complaint, makes me feel incredibly special and cared about.

2) I came to a point where I decided I would be happy whether I get the surgery or not. For the past few months I have been seriously stressing out about getting this surgery. I decided that is just one direction my life could go and if it goes that way great! But I am not pinning my happiness on it.

3) Things will work out once way or another. My surgeon is re-doing the pre-determination and they are going to submit that again to my medical insurance. Maybe they will accept it this time, maybe they won't. That is just one way the surgery could happen. If they don't approve it we will start working on other ways. I just need to be patient.

Now, my sleep study results = "essentially normal".

Bad news: Still don't have an answer for whyyy I am often so very tired.

Good news: I only have to have surgery on my lower jaw instead of upper and lower. Less risk of complications and/or side effects from surgery that way.

Other good news, not related to my sleep study results. I don't have to have any orthodontic work done before surgery. So once the insurance stuff gets worked out we can set a date without having to worry about doing anything extra to be ready. :)

Just waiting now!

Is Modesty Biblical?

So, today we are going to go a littler deeper and a lot more controversial than I usually do here on my blog.This is a topic that has been on my mind for a few months.


My 16yo sister told me how she got in trouble for wearing tank tops at her homeschool co-op and there is now a rule against bare shoulders. Shoulders! Then a girl posted a video entitled, "Men's View on Modesty", on my 18yo sister's facebook wall. It was 14min long and I didn't even get through the first three minutes before I was so enraged I couldn't think straight. 


I can't stand this prevailing attitude that all men think about it sex sex sex and women are to blame. I have to speak out. For myself. For my sisters. For women and girls everywhere. 


As a grown up married woman I believe that the standard for how I dress should be between my husband and I. Yet, I struggle with wearing what I want to wear because I fear judgement from my parents and my community if I don't fit their standard of modesty. It shouldn't be this way! I should feel freedom in Christ. But I don't.

I have always felt, at least since being a teen, that I had to cover up and apologize for being born a woman. The homeschool and Christian community shames and burdens women with men's lust. I thought I was odd for thinking that and was really never able to put it in words until I read this recent post Modesty, Lust and Emotional Rape by a woman named Lauren Nicole. I am not alone! And, if you feel like this too, you are not alone! 


Truth is, men are so much stronger and capable then they are given credit for. This whole Christian modesty thing probably does more harm than help. It teaches men they have no responsibility. It teaches women that their beauty, a wonderful and delightful blessing from God, is a curse instead. 


Modesty. What does it mean? And is it Biblical? 


Modesty is freedom from vanity and boastfulness. Modesty is simplicity and moderation. Modesty is a behavior, a virtue, a heart issue. In that sense, modesty is Biblical. 


Modesty as a set of rules on how much skin you can show,  how tight your clothing can be, and even what type of garments you can wear is not Biblical. 


Things the bible says on this topic:

"I also want the women to dress modestly, with decency and propriety, adorning themselves, not with elaborate hairstyles or gold or pearls or expensive clothes, but with good deeds, appropriate for women who profess to worship God."

1 Timothy 2:9-10

Here we go, it is that word "modestly". Did you read all the way through verse 10? Taken in context here "modestly" is a still a virtue not a rule about skin showing. We get confused because clothes are mentioned here, but nowhere in this verse is a rule about what we can and can not wear. Look, this verse is saying you shouldn't be known for how much time you spend on your hair, or for your jewelry or be obsessed with name brands just for the name. It is not saying there is anything wrong with quality clothes, nice hair and pretty jewelry. It is simply saying don't let that consume you. Be a woman who has a heart for others. Be a woman who shows people the love of God. 

Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear—  but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious. 

1 Peter 3:3-4

Again, this is not against clothing, jewelry and hair styles. This is against letting those things be who you are. You gotta work on your internal self as well as your external self. 

“A woman shall not wear man’s clothing, nor shall a man put on a woman’s clothing; for the Lord your God detests anyone who does this."

 Deuteronomy 22:5

There is nothing here about not wearing pants. Or really what exactly to wear at all. Simply put this verse is telling us that God created us as a woman or a man. One is not better than the other and you should be proud of what God made you. So, if you are a woman dress like one! Don't hide yourself in baggy ill fitting men's clothing. Feel free to wear clothes that accentuate your womanliness. 

"She is not afraid of the snow for her household: for all her household are clothed with scarlet. She maketh herself coverings of tapestry; her clothing is silk and purple." 

Proverbs 31:21-22

So two things here. First, clothes are functional. Dress for the weather. It is totally ok and even right to have clothes specifically for different seasons, different occasions and different tasks. Second, clothes are more than just functional. Tapestry is intricate. Silk is delicate. Purple is rich. It is ok and even right to dress beautifully! It is ok to spend time and money on quality clothing that makes you feel and look good. That is all part of being a woman. A woman who is precious and valuable. 

~

In conclusion, this whole idea of Biblical modesty was never meant to be a rule book for what is and isn't right to wear. It is really about working on your internal self, becoming a better person and showing love to others. 

Thankful Tuesday - Week 2

At least five things from the past week that I am thankful for:

- my husband cleaning the toilet
- a lazy Saturday morning sleeping in with my husband
- biscuits for breakfast on Saturday
- my husband used headphones to watch TV while I was sleeping. without me even asking or anything!
- the mom I work for totally upheld my authority and made her daughter apologize for having an attitude with me.
- my husband went in the middle of the night to fill up the gas in the car because I forgot and didn't have enough to get to work
- my husband washed, dried, and folded our laundry

Thankful Tuesday - Week 1

“If you can’t say something nice, don’t say nothing at all.”

Thumper had it half right. It is every bit as important to actually say nice things.

So last week I was basically throwing a fit... umm... ever since I started working full time I just lose it emotionally about once a week. My husband is pretty good at dealing with this, but he was getting fed up and he told me that I was being really ungrateful and I was doing way too much complaining.

A few years ago Dan helped me learn to be more thankful by teaching me to verbalize my gratitude. I was really surprised how this simple act really made see so much more to be thankful for. Saying out loud "Thank you for *specific thing*" actually made me feel more thankful. I also learned not to take so much for granted, their was a lot lot be thankful for!

Well... last week he told me that complaining about stuff actually makes you feel even worse about whatever it is you are complaining about and that attitude will cary over to the rest of your life as well. That should have been so obvious, but somehow I missed it.

My husband is amazing at not complaining. I know he has plenty of things he could complain about, but it just isn't his way of life to do that. I really look up to him for this! I am queen at complaining. I am so good at it I don't even know I am doing it! I need to work on this. I am instituting Thankful Tuesdays on my blog where I will find at least five things from the past week to be thankful about.

I am thankful that:

• My husband is honest with me.
• My husband is so willing to do what it takes to get my health fixed up.
• My initial appointment with my oral surgeon is over and I feel confidant with him as a doctor. 
• The family I work for let me take their 9month old daughter to my appointment so I wouldn't have to wait till summer. (p.s. She was really good all day! Not fussy! Made the day so much easier.)
• The Dad I work for is a sleep technician. He won't be doing my study, but it has been really helpful knowing someone in the field!
• My husband cleans up around the house. 
• We made it to church for the third week in a row! 
• We went to home group for the first time and seemed to fit right in (even though everyone else is at least 30years older than us.) Plus there was good food!

Yay! That was more than five things. Now I have to be on the lookout for things to be thankful for this week.

What have you experienced this past week that you are thankful for?

Jaw Surgery - Sleep Apnea Symptoms

Fabio

Yes, this picture actually does have something to do with my surgery. Just keep reading. 

*I am having a bit of difficulty trying to figure out how much to share. I might be erring more on the side of under sharing. If you have any questions I am happy to answer. *

So, as I mentioned in my first post about my jaw surgery Dr. T wants me to get a sleep study done to see if I have obstructive sleep apnea. I had never even heard of sleep apnea until a few days prior to meeting Dr. T. I looked it up and ready a bit about it thinking perhaps I had it. Then after Dr. T brought it up I researched a little more and I'm almost positive this is explains my tiredness and a lot of other stuff too!

First, if you don't know, sleep apnea basically means you stop or have pauses in your breathing while you are sleeping and therefore don't get enough oxygen.

Here I was going to list the symptoms, but decided against it. If you really wanna know you can look it up. If you feel you are more tired in the day than you should be, look it up! and go talk to your doctor! Sleep apnea can be extremely detrimental to you health (like heart failure). I wish I would have known years ago, but I am really glad I know now and am working on getting it resolved.

Lets just say I am pretty much a picture perfect patient. Not fun. But I am so excited to maybe finally (after 7 years) have an answer to a lot of my health issues!!! Also, if this is the answer, it means my health issues are actually more serious than I thought, really have been beyond my control, and I can stop feeling guilty for not being able to function like a normal person. 

Anyway, I need to have a sleep study done to officially diagnose sleep apnea. 

I scheduled my sleep study today. The technician watching me sleep for a Saturday night next May... his name is Fabio. No joke. 

If it is confirmed I have sleep apnea than I will for sure need double jaw surgery. This will not only align my bite properly, but also open up my airway (hopefully) enabling me to breath at night.

People with smaller jaws, like me, are in the group of those more likely to have sleep apnea. Another cause of sleep apnea is swollen lymphoid tissue due to the Epstein-Barr virus. The swelling usually goes down after mono, but occasionally does not. Since I really haven't been well since I had mono, I also want to talk to my doctor about the possibility of removing my tonsils and/or adenoids.

I wanna BREATH! I wanna SLEEP! I wanna LIVE!

Jaw Surgery - It is Official

I have known for two years now that I might need jaw surgery. I got scared and didn't purse it further. Finally, in big part to the insistence of my husband (I kept saying "IF I need surgery." My husband would say "WHEN you get surgery." I was pretty much just in denial.), I made an appointment with a surgeon and got a consultation. I think it took all of 60 seconds and just a bit of prodding around in my mouth before the surgeon told me surgery would be, "reasonable."

The surgeon, we will call him Dr. T, explained to me I had the option of of trying orthodontics, but it wouldn't be nearly as beneficial. He wasn't pushy at all. Just very matter of fact in sort of a friendly way actually. He then told me that if I were to go forward with surgery I would need to get pictures, x-rays, and models of my teeth. I looked at my husband, looked back and Dr. T and said let's do it now. I don't think the office was prepared for that at all! It took another two hours before we got out of there. Lots of waiting, they must have been squeezing us in between all the other appointments. I guess most people aren't so ready to move forward with surgery as soon as they find out, but I had been thinking this over for years and it took enough courage to get me in that office once I wasn't about to leave!

Most people who read this blog or know me in person are probably wondering why I need surgery. So, here is the most apparent reason I need surgery:

My teeth do not come together in the front! In both these photos I am biting down in the back. This makes it incredibly difficult and frustrating to eat a lot of normal foods like burgers, sandwiches, pizza. 

Biting down in the back and I can stick my tongue through my teeth. At least I don't have to worry about biting my tongue off. 

Dr. T first said I just needed lower jaw surgery. That was a relief! But then he went and looked at my charts and the x-rays, came back, asked me some questions about how I sleep, gave me a sleepiness quiz (Epworth Sleepiness Scale) and then concluded that it is probable I have sleep apnea and would therefore need upper and lower jaw surgery. The purpose of moving the upper jaw as well would be to open up my airway. He prescribed me a sleep study to find out more. I have to get that done before we can do anything else. 

I hadn't considered sleep apnea before as a reason for my tiredness, but now it makes so much sense! I think I will write about that in another post. I am still very scared of all the risks involved with surgery, but I am also really excited that it may be able to help me with a lot more than just biting through foods. 

I guess that is it for now. I will keep up-dating about my experience. I like reading other people's experiences with jaw surgery, and I can't find very many that have the same problem as me. If you have any question please ask and I will do my best to answer them! Thanks for reading. 

Candlelight

Dan and I have this candle... sconce thing... in our room and I finally got some candles for it! 

I also have some candles on my dresser. 

The candlesticks are teal. I got them at a garage sale for 50 cents. Love. 

Candlelight is so tranquil. I wish it was safe to sleep with candles burning. 

Everyone should have candles in their room. Especially married people. 

Sorry this is such a short shallow post. I am tired. Very tired. 

I am super excited that tomorrow is Saturday and I don't have to work! 

Follow me on Twitter? twitter.com/ToBeHisWife

Flat Expectations and Other Shoes

Excuse my absence the past few weeks. I normally only work a part time job, but I recently took a full time job and I had to work both jobs for two weeks. Now I am just down to the full time job, but I am still very busy. And tired. Anyway...

Pretty sad looking, huh? I got these shoes probably 5 or 6 years ago and it has come time to say goodbye to them. Somehow some oil got on the right one and stretched it out so it no longer fits. As you can see they were looking pretty ratty anyway. They probably should have been thrown out a few years ago. I just haven't been able to find a suitable replacement. 

You see, I only paid $30 for that pair of flats and they are actually leather. I got a good deal. And now I don't want to settle for less. The only thing I can find (and I have done hours upon HOURS of searching, shopping and trying on) that I think would be an equal replacement in terms of quality and comfort is the Cole Haan Air Bacara Ballet.

Cute little detailing on the back. Actually leather! Comfortable! In short, perfect. Except one thing of course. The price: $148. 

>_<

Just can't do it. No matter how perfect they. So alas, I am without flats. Oh well... I should be able to get through the summer without them. It is pretty hot down here and I could use a bigger sandal collection. 

Speaking of which... I used some birthday money to get myself these:

Born Geralyn

Real leather! And look at the wedge, flowers!

These appear to not exist on the internet as I can not find them anywhere. They were the only pair I saw at the DSW I bought them from (and I found them on the clearance rack), but today at a different DSW I saw a bunch. So, best wishes if you want a pair for yourself! 

I wasn't sure about keeping the Geralyns, but I decided I would as a birthday gift to myself. Sometimes I can be too practical. I need to learn that it is ok to have some things just because I think they pretty. As long as I am not spending excessively of course! Birthday money is a perfect opportunity to buy something just because I want it and not because I need it. 

 I still need some flat sandals for everyday wear. And I really would prefer sandals over flip-flops. I have been wearing skirts and dresses a lot more often this year and flip-flops just do not go. 

I think I might end up getting the B.O.C. Keiko Sandal

It is not real leather, but it a great brand. I don't doubt that they will last and a cushioned footbed is something I would really prefer. Why are most the flat sandals available right now so terribly flat? You know what I am talking about? 

Anyway... there is also this pair... OH! And when I looked at it a few days ago it was only shown in black, but now I see a gold pair! Hmm. I think I like the black better, but I already have a pair of black sandals. 

B.O.C. Cersei Sandal

And then their is this pair of shoes which I just totally adore. These could count as sandals, right?

Miz Mooz Darla Flat

Real leather! And... more than $100. Yeah... but I am gonna keep my eye on these and see if they go on sale, because I really like them. 

To wrap up this post look what my mother in law got me for Christmas!

Christmas was like... you know more than three months ago and I just got my gift this weekend. My mother in law is notorious for doing things late. But good things are worth waiting for. ;) 

Simple Purple Dress

I just made this dress yesterday. I am in love! So comfortable and cute. I am a huge fan of being comfortable!!! First, pictures of the finished dress and then below some construction photos if you want to make your own.

 

 Loooove the back. I cut the butterflies out from some burnout velvet I have and then appliqued them on the back. I love those little things that make a simple thing special and different. 

Although this dress is pretty simple, it uses stretch fabric and should have some knowledge of sewing. This isn't going to be an exact step by step, this is just going to give you the basic idea of what I did. I  used a four way stretch cotton from Spandex World.

Lay a dress or a shirt that you like the fit of on the fold your fabric. Trace around it adding seam allowance. I folded up the sleeves a bit because I wanted 3/4 sleeves. This top part should go down to about the widest part of your hips. I made mine pretty straight (the whole dress is wide enough to just fit around my hips) because I wanted a bit of a looser look. If you want when sewing you can make yours tighter at the waist. Just make sure you cut it out wide enough to fit around your hips. Cut a front and a back. They are the same. 

I originally thought I might want dolman sleeves, so I cut it out that way. I later decided I didn't like that and cut the sleeves smaller. Here you can see where I cut small sleeves smaller. 

 

Skirt! My skirt part is two layers of the same shape, one is just shorter than the other. Here you can see the basic shape, if you don't have have a skirt to trace just make the top of the skirt the same as the bottom of your dress and then draw a shape like above. Make sure to cut out a front and a back. 

Sew together the front and back top. Sew together the sides of the skirts. Layer the skirts together. Sew skirts to top. I didn't take any pictures of this part... it is pretty much the same as putting together any other simple dress. Is that alright? 

Make sure to use a zig-zag stitch, ballpoint needle and polyester thread (I HIGHLY recommend Gutermann)

I originally cut neckline much smaller. For one thing, stretch fabric stretches. For another thing, it is always easier to make the neckline bigger but you can never go smaller! I tried the dress on and adjusted the neckline a bit at a time till I got it how I wanted. 

Sew the neckline with a straight stitch being very careful not to stretch it. 

That is it! I didn't hem the sleeves or the skirts. 

But I wasn't reaaallly done... 

Blue dress inside out and about to become purple dress!

 I used Rit Dye in Scarlet. I divided the dress in to five sections. Dipped the first section in for two minutes, then put the dress in deeper for another minute, then deeper again. About one minute for each section till the last one where I just dipped it in, made sure it was all wet then pulled it out. It might be kind of hard to tell in the pictures, but the dress is darker on the bottom. The effect will of course be stronger the longer you leave the item in the dye. 

Rinsing... it looks like blood...

Yes... the tub is now stained pink. 

The buttons on the sleeves! I couldn't decided which ones I wanted so I got them all and mixed them up. I love how it turned out. 

So that is all! I am done with this dress. If you wanna make your own and have any questions let me know! I will do my best to help.